Who Completes You? • Dearly Loved

I recalled a conversation where I was asked if I had a boyfriend. When my reply was an honest no, it was met with disbelief. When they dug deeper and realised I had not gone into a single romantic relationship, they considered the possibility that I might be same-sex attracted, and asked if I was straight. They started offering tips on how I can escalate a romantic relationship.

While I choose to understand that they might be really well meaning people, this also brought about the realisation of the mainstream thought. By your twenties, if you are not in a relationship, either you are not attracted to the opposite gender, or something is dead wrong with you. Hence, you feel the pressure to rush into a relationship (reflecting on my past experiences, I found the pressure to be very real.) Out of impulse, you may throw yourself to any Tom or Jane for completeness sake. You feel relieved changing your Facebook status and falling into the normal gang.

The close proximity of the dates between Chinese New Year and Valentine’s Day brings a double whammy pressure. Maybe, more accurately speaking, it may be regarded as a dread and sad day for singles - the reminder from your relatives and the world world of your singlehood.

I throw some big fat questions for you (and myself as well) to consider. Why do you feel the rush to get into a relationship? What is sad and wrong about being single? Why do you feel incomplete till the other half comes into the picture? Will they, or are they even suppose to complete you?

What about your loved ones who dearly love you? Why do you wallow in sorrow when there are people who loves you? Why must you want that kind of love?

Who completes you?

I do not know about you. For myself, I came to realise in my early twenties that the pressure I felt (as mentioned above) can be regarded as false. I learn to be comfortable on my own. I learn to have some me time. I learn to look at myself in the mirror and admire my own face. I learn to love myself.

Ultimately, I (am learning to) rest my definition of completeness in the One who created and perfectly loves me even before I knew Him. He is the lover of my soul.

Again, I ask: Who completes you?

Lastly, here is a picture unrelated to my thoughts - the Singapore bird (haha).

Complete In You (Parachute Band)


So I lift my eyes to you Lord
In your strength will I break through Lord
Touch me now, let your love fall down on me
I know your love dispels all my fears
Through the storm I will hold on Lord
And by faith I will walk on Lord
Then I'll see beyond my calvary one day
And I will be complete in You